Its been a while.
Sorry, but I'm NOT sorry.
I will not apologize for needing time to breathe and just exist.
I have been on a break from the blog just to make sure that my life is on track. And if I am being completely honest...... It has been a much needed break.
I was feeling overwhelmed.
& down right discouraged.
I have worked extremely hard on this page. Everything from the design to the content is planned by yours truly.
I have no experience in designing graphics- yet I somehow manage every week.
I have no experience in creating a website and owning a domain- yet somehow I have managed to figure that portion out.
Ya'll want me to be compeltely and 100% honest..., I have not experienced the growth that I thought I desired. I am not willing to pay for any followers on instagram, or for my subscribers to my blog.
we live in a society where our lives are depicted by a series of tiled pictures, and challenging the alagrithms of instagram can be difficult.
Everyone is tagging everything from lunch dates to relaxation time. (I am guilty of this too- I know)
I just got completely overwhelmed by all of this.
So I took a break. I walked away. I contemplated quitting.
During this break, I took time to relfect on that very desire. Is monetizing this blog something that I am looking to do? Would my subscribers/ followers be interested in seeing more ads? How is my content for 2019 going to continue to be relevant as I change and my goals change? Am I even relevant anymore?
Maybe I am the only one but has anyone else noticed that we completely overshare way too much of our lives on the internet? I mean I see people sharing everything from their BM's (which weight loss patients I can understand its a necessary topic for some people to ask questions about) to memes complaining about work.
Maybe its just me and my current desire for privacy.
I am fully aware that I have chosen to be vulnerable throughout my journey and have chosen a path that requires me to post online.
Don't worry- I fully understand that.
I can also understand when I am feeling the deep need to keep things to myself.
Since 2018 brought SO MANY changes to my life, I was constantly updating everyone about everything that has been happening. While It has been great for me to use this blog as a place to express my emotions, it can be overwhelming.
As I said earlier, I have not monetized this adventure of mine. Any event that I throw, I rely on partnerships to make happen while being fully aware that I am investing in creating and cultivating community that I fully believe in. I allow myself a small budget for each event, but that doesn't make it easy.
At this point I am sure you are asking yourself, what is she going to do next?
After a lot of contemplation, self love, discovery and grace during my failures- I have decided the blog stays.
Its too important to me.
So launching into the rest of 2019, Ive decided a couple of things:
- I will not guage my successes on the number of followers I have on instagram.
-I will not guage my successes by the number of clicks I have on a blog post.
- I will not guage my success by the number of visits I have to my website.
- I will work on giving myself grace in the event that I get overwhelmed.
- I will stay true to myself and continue to post the content that is important to me and my journey.
- I will not overshare my life/
- I will not monetize my blog.
- I WILL GIVE MYSELF THE GIFT OF PRIVACY WHEN I NEED IT.
- share or don't share- its totally up to you what you put out into the universe for everyone to know about.
- give yourself the privacy you need.
-its okay to take a break if you need to.
-its okay to reevaluate your priorities.